her war - The Courage Community - Inspiring Action, Through InterAction.

I feel like giving up I feel like giving up

From: ainyfauziyah
Description:

Mike, I do understand with your feeling. And I do understand your strong willingness to wake up and be cured from PTSD and TBI. I have written my book now within title The Power of Willingness. I've meet people within their disability either phisically and mentally. I do also interview people who wake up from their live after they were desperate for some reasons. As human being we have one thing to fight every obstacles. We call it 'willingness'. Try to recall your potentials, try to recall anything that
7 months ago
Views: 239
Forum: General Dis...

ainyfauziyah

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Points:300
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Since: 8 months ago

redcajundj

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Points:425
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Since: 10 months ago

TommyPrice85

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Surprises Surprises

From: Anita
Description:

I know still talking about my husband’s deployment but you know how these things go ….can’t let it go!
The issue is, I never realized how much influence Uncle Sam had over my marriage until this past summer when we learned about the Surprise Deployment. It was supposed to be a time when my husband wouldn’t, even better couldn’t, deploy because he’s back in training. He told me repeatedly that while things are never really sure in the military, the next three months would certainly, even for military standards, have him home.
Then in May he came home from work while I was cooking dinner (a rarity in itself) and furtively looked from me, to the stove, to the kitchen counters and back to me without uttering a syllable.
I think he was assessing my mood on my Italian scale — hot, steaming or burning — hot being my steady state. After a few minutes of feeling his eyes on the back of my neck, I told him to go ahead and tell me what was wrong “for crying out loud!”
“I’m deploying in a few days” was his response.
My mood instantly shot up to burning, but I didn’t say anything. After a few minutes of compulsively stirring a saucepan — a giveaway that I wasn’t pleased — I told him that we would manage just fine, we’ve done it so many times. No big deal.
Truthfully, I can manage most practical issues extremely well. I’m efficient and organized and keep everyone busy. I don’t get overwhelmed by the kids or our day-to-day living. However, the one thing suffers the most in these situations is our relationship. My husband and I have been fighting a lot since he told me the news of his upcoming deployment.
It’s not that simple or straightforward. We don’t consciously decide that we’ll be on each other’s nerves or pick fights about insignificant details – it’s just the way stress comes out.
This stress is directly related to deployments and constantly having the rug pulled from under our feet. Like most marriages, we’ve had our ups and downs but when we spend some time together we get along well. With him home since February, we’ve gone on dates, saw a couple of movies, wrote silly cards to each other, and felt like we were actually getting to know each other all over again.
Then the unexpected deployment comes around and the stress mounts again. I start arguing in my usual Italian manner and my husband retreats into an impenetrable emotional fortress.
I don’t like to think that Uncle Sam is such a big presence in my marriage but he clearly is. Deployments create a lot of problems for us, not unsurpassable ones, but real ones nonetheless.
I know, I know … tough it out and stop complaining, we signed up for this, no one forced us, and so on. I also know that my husband is part of special operations which means more intense and unpredictable rotations. But the deployment stress adds one more layer of pressure on the family.
I don’t have any great suggestions for how to fix the volatile nature of military life. Particularly in a time of war, all of us in the military make sacrifices. I guess I’m just blowing off a little steam, in the hope that maybe my Italian mood level might drop back down to being merely “hot,” and my husband and I can enjoy a short, stress-free time before he heads out the door.
Blog post
10 months ago
Views: 349
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Long distance intimacy Long distance intimacy

From: Anita
Description:

I often receive questions about relationships from other women. Being from Italy, the land of passion, my reputation as a Latin lover at times precedes my reputation as writer. Recently, an anonymous reader I will call Jane asked me if I had tips to stay intimate with a partner during long absences and in her particular case deployments.
I started responding to Jane and realized that the answer was harder than what I thought. For starters, this topic can be embarrassing for the writer and the reader. I know you don’t want to know specifics of my sex life, and probably don’t especially want to share yours. But being too broad and dispensing advice that is obvious doesn’t work either. Intimacy is a crucial part of any relationship and we should work on it by communicating and being honest, but what exactly does this mean when it comes to the physical part of intimacy, in the context of long absences?
I’m not reducing intimacy to sex. Intimacy is much more than physical closeness, it includes the emotional, mental, and the visceral desire to be with another person. Open communication and honesty go a long way when we only have phone calls and emails. But my experience has been that the scale is tipped toward all other aspects of intimacy and that when it comes time to talk about sex, people turn purple and start talking in generalities.
It’s embarrassing. Women in particular have a hard time discussing sex and admitting that they miss it – which doesn’t mean that one should go out and look for it elsewhere. But it does mean that acknowledging our physical frustration can help bring us closer to our partner and strengthen other areas of our relationship. Personally, I have ignored this aspect of my marriage on more than one occasion when my husband was gone. I didn’t know what to say or how to share my thoughts with him. I loved him and he loved me, but should I send him a steamy letter about our sex life or suggest that I can take care of my needs on my own while he’s gone? (There I said it, now you don’t have to feel badly about thinking it!).
When I started hinting at things or being upfront about these issues, my husband and I got much closer.
The best thing that I can say to my friend Jane is that if she wants to be intimate with her husband while he is apart, she needs to find out what intimacy means to her personally. Is it sharing a fantasy, is it a steamy letter or code words on the phone? Is it buying special toys while her loved one is gone and telling him about it? Or is it much less steamy, a heart and sweet words letter?
I can’t give Jane the answers. But I can say that sex within the context of a loving relationship needs to be acknowledged and that oftentimes, for men especially, it validates their emotional needs.
Absence is never easy. But with a little attention to each other’s needs, it can, as the expression goes, make the heart grow fonder.
Blog post
10 months ago
Views: 425
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Intimacy Intimacy

From: Anita
Description:

I often receive questions about relationships from other women. Being from Italy, the land of passion, my reputation as a Latin lover at times precedes my reputation as writer. Recently, an anonymous reader I will call Jane asked me if I had tips to stay intimate with a partner during long absences and in her particular case deployments.
I started responding to Jane and realized that the answer was harder than what I thought. For starters, this topic can be embarrassing for the writer and the reader. I know you don’t want to know specifics of my sex life, and probably don’t especially want to share yours. But being too broad and dispensing advice that is obvious doesn’t work either. Intimacy is a crucial part of any relationship and we should work on it by communicating and being honest, but what exactly does this mean when it comes to the physical part of intimacy, in the context of long absences?
I’m not reducing intimacy to sex. Intimacy is much more than physical closeness, it includes the emotional, mental, and the visceral desire to be with another person. Open communication and honesty go a long way when we only have phone calls and emails. But my experience has been that the scale is tipped toward all other aspects of intimacy and that when it comes time to talk about sex, people turn purple and start talking in generalities.
It’s embarrassing. Women in particular have a hard time discussing sex and admitting that they miss it – which doesn’t mean that one should go out and look for it elsewhere. But it does mean that acknowledging our physical frustration can help bring us closer to our partner and strengthen other areas of our relationship. Personally, I have ignored this aspect of my marriage on more than one occasion when my husband was gone. I didn’t know what to say or how to share my thoughts with him. I loved him and he loved me, but should I send him a steamy letter about our sex life or suggest that I can take care of my needs on my own while he’s gone? (There I said it, now you don’t have to feel badly about thinking it!).
When I started hinting at things or being upfront about these issues, my husband and I got much closer.
The best thing that I can say to my friend Jane is that if she wants to be intimate with her husband while he is apart, she needs to find out what intimacy means to her personally. Is it sharing a fantasy, is it a steamy letter or code words on the phone? Is it buying special toys while her loved one is gone and telling him about it? Or is it much less steamy, a heart and sweet words letter?
I can’t give Jane the answers. But I can say that sex within the context of a loving relationship needs to be acknowledged and that oftentimes, for men especially, it validates their emotional needs.
Absence is never easy. But with a little attention to each other’s needs, it can, as the expression goes, make the heart grow fonder.
Blog post
10 months ago
Views: 39
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Dara Torres Dara Torres

From: BuildingBridges
Description:

I interviewed Dara Torres and I wanted to post some of the interview I conducted. First of all, Dara’s abs are every woman’s dream, but her personal story is what’s truly inspirational. I like that in her book, Age is Just a Number, she doesn’t only talk about her amazing success but also about some of her difficult times and the obstacles she overcame.
ANITA: What advice do you have for moms who feel they are indeed too old to do something or to try something after they have children?
DARA: My advice for these moms would be not to think that way. You’re never too old to do or try to do something, including after you have children.
ANITA: What was it like to train for the Olympics in your early forties? Is training different for you now that you’re older than it was when you were younger?
DARA: Training for the Olympics in my forties was a lot different than when I was younger. At my age, I have to be much more aware about what of my body can and can’t do. Recovery time for my body is very different now than what it was when I was training for the Olympics as a teenager.
ANITA: Is your relationship to the sport different now that you are older?
DARA: Yes, my relationship with swimming has definitely changed with age. I see it from a different perspective and appreciate it so much more than I did when I was younger.
ANITA:Has being a mom made a difference in your experience as an athlete and at the Olympics?
DARA: Being a mom made me realize that being an athlete and making it to the Olympics is not the most important thing. Realizing that really helped take the pressure off as I was training for the 2008 Olympics.
ANITA: You talk about infertility in your book – what got you through those tough times?
DARA: There were a lot of ups and downs and it was a really tough time in my life because I had no control. As an athlete, I’m used to having power over the outcome, I know what I have to do in order to win a race; but with this, there wasn’t anything I could do and there were no guarantees that I would have a baby.
ANITA: All women struggle with body image. You truly look amazing yet you’ve struggle with an eating disorder. Do you have insights you can share about your own experience and how you overcame bulimia?
DARA: I was embarrassed about my eating disorder and was afraid to talk to someone about it. Getting over the embarrassment was difficult for me but I got tired of keeping my bulimia a secret and consented to get help.
ANITA:Do you still have tough days?
DARA: No, I am over my eating disorder completely.
ANITA: Your father passed away and you write about how difficult it was. What helped you make it through those sad times?
DARA: The first year was really hard; it was an emotional roller coaster for me. I felt like my father was still with me and that helped make it easier.
ANITA: Do you consider competing at the next Olympics?
DARA: Yes but I would have to take a lot of things into consideration. I’m going to have to see what happens this summer with Nationals and Worlds.
ANITA: Do you have future plans for what you’ll do after you’re done swimming professionally?
DARA: No, I’m still trying to figure out what I want to do when I grow up.
I loved the last thing she said. I too feel that I’m still trying to figure out what I want to do when I grow up. Thinking about Dara I can’t help but envy her six pack….but as I stare at a picture of her super-defined stomach I realize that I’d settle for a two pack and it wouldn’t even have to look half as good as hers…
Blog post
10 months ago
Views: 311
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Children and inspiration Children and inspiration

From: BuildingBridges
Description:

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I'm excited to start my journey here at the courage community. I hope you'll join me soon. I'm traveling this week, but will be back in touch next week to share some of this crazy ride with all its twists and turns.
BTW if you are traveling a straight road - in life that woudl be - let me know which one it is I still haven't found one.
I want to share a little bit about my children who are such a big part of my life. I have five daughters.
My kids inspire me to be a better person. They test my patience, they make me laugh, they make me cry, they humble me.I can always do better for them.
My daughter Anna has a special place in my heart. One that includes uneven bars, a beam, a bouncy floor and a vault. Anna is six and a half years old. She’s a competitive gymnast.
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Gymnastics is tough. It demands everything and more. Anna trains twenty hours per week. Her love of gymnastics is far older than her young age. It’s so big I wonder if her little heart can hold it all in one place. That’s why sometimes I carry that love in my heart. That’s why sometimes my heart skips a beat when she tumbles through the air.
But then I look at her face and there she is, my Anna. Smiling at her coach. She has hard calluses on her hands from all the time spent on those uneven bars. She’s so proud when she gets a rip, when she does a kip with straight arms. She doesn’t stop when it’s tough. Even if the high bar looks far from where she’s standing. And she just goes for it. Some days she sticks it. Some days she falls on her butt. But she keeps going back and striving for more.
I stand on the sidelines because I can’t make it happen for her. No one can. It’s all within her. I can bring you to the road she wishes to take but she walks this path alone. I’m here, I watch and smile and kiss her little cheek. And shed a tear when she falls and gets hurt. Sometimes I wonder if it’s too much for a small child, but she can’t seem to stop practicing no matter where we go. she's determined and strong and she's one of the loves of my life.
How do your kids inspire you?
Blog post
10 months ago
Views: 324
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CatRN

Member
Points:385
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Since: 11 months ago

or Courage- Day 10- Trip Home or Courage- Day 10- Trip Home Part II

From: Carlana
Description:


TRIP HOME
DAY 11
PART II

So the next morning, I got up early,and went over to see if Bob was working. I also wanted to have them look over the trike to make sure everything was in good shape for our upcoming trip through the dry desert heat. Sure enough, Bob (who I found out is actually the service manager) was working and even though I hadn't scheduled an appointment, they took her right in and gave her the once-over ... even gave her a bath! And, they wouldn't accept a thing for it. All “on the house” Bob said. I swear, you meet the nicest people on the road and in the biker community. I mean, I had only met Bob that one time, and visited with him for an hour on our way one week before. Seeing him again was like running into an old friend. We just clicked.

While Bob and the guys in the shop were checkin' on “Destiny,” I hung out indoors, talking to some of the others who worked there. I was downing lots of water... staying hydrated is critical when you're riding in extreme temperatures. I met a chick, Lynda, who works in “motorclothes.” I told her how excited I was about our upcoming trip through Moab. I'd never been there. Pat had told me, “gotta stop at Eddie McStiff's” – he said. Lynda seconded that. Lynda was very familiar with the area as she has ridden through Moab countless times. With pen and paper in hand, she began jotting down the most beautiful routes and more hotspots to check out along the way. What a doll.
Blog post
11 months ago
Views: 279
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Ride for Courage Day - Trip Ho Ride for Courage Day - Trip Home 10 Part I

From: Carlana
Description:


TRIP HOME
DAY 10
PART 1

After leaving Denver in the morning, we jumped on I-70 South. Pat had uploaded some Samples to my phone. I rode down I-70 – listening to the Samples, and Animals... yup -Pink Floyd. Isn't it funny how you can listen to a song, and immediately, you find yourself back in that moment. I don't know, with me, music has always connected me with memories. So with the mountain fresh wind in my face, the beautiful mountainous backdrop and “Nature” booming in my ears, I relished in the fabulous memories of the good ole college days, many of which I had just recounted during the CU mini-reunion in Denver.

I had to make a quick stop by Keystone Lodge and pick up my extra things, which I shipped home. Ya really learn how to pack when you have limited space and you're living out of your suitcase.... throw in the limited space on a motorcycle. I had practically packed my entire wardrobe. Just didn't want to hassle with it, so in a box it went and shipped it home. Big worry off my mind.

I met with the grounds manager at Keystone Lodge – what a sweetie pie. I just made one last ditch effort by calling to see if they had somehow miraculously found the cushion. They hadn't. Can y'all believe she actually walked the grounds herself looking for that cushion???? I mean, she had never laid eyes on me. I was so lucky I got to stop by and meet her in person and thank her face-to-face. We hugged and promised to stay in touch. She even let me shoot a quick interview with her. Check it out on the videos here.

Leaving Keystone, we jumped back on the I-70 and stopped for the night in Grand Junction. The next morning, I visited my buddy, Bob, over at Grand Junction Harley. We met him on our way out to the conference– he brought out the bottled waters, showed us where the ladies' room was and just treated us like we were family. I promised Bob to swing by on our way back through.
Blog post
11 months ago
Views: 242
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Ride for Courage- Day 1 Part I Ride for Courage- Day 1 Part I

From: Carlana
Description:


Day 1
Part I

We all managed to meet up the early morning of August 16, 2009 for the 1000 plus trek to the Colorado Rockies from Southern California. There was Debbie, the ringleader,
Debbie was unquestionably the ring-leader, tassels flowing from her crimson suede jacket as she leaded the posse. And her Harley, adorned with Debbie's signature style -Tricked out with fishtail pipes - down to the leather tassels blowing in the wind. Debbie is a force to be reckoned with. She rides, speaks, acts, with such confidence and complete jurisdiction that you don't dare question it. She's honest and unapologetic for the person she is and the life she leads. Debbie is a caretaker by nature, - she's earned her stripes and proven her unwavering commitment to those whom she's coddled under her protective wing.
She's got a story of personal ownership, integrity and unshakable self-esteem. Debbie prides herself on her individuality and personal statements. Her character and demeanor mock that of the unique trait of her dressing and style of communication. She's there to make sure everyone is taken care of. No guessing when it comes to her. That's for damn sure. You don't mess with Debbie. A force to be reckoned with. this woman has undoubtedly found her right of passage... and taken it on the road. In less that 6years, Debbie has logged over 110,000 miles on her bike. And she's just getting started.

Eldonna AKA "pinkbikerchic" - master of her domain. very feminine yet badass. great combo. she's a retired Master Sgt in the AirForce - need i say more???
Then there was the ever so confident and quiet, Syl _ who rides a "Naked Ducati" - to be perfectly honest, i was anticipating a naked chick on a Ducati... oh boy. did i have a lot to learn. Sylvia, to me, is silent strength. a woman who is unbreakable, unstoppable, and knows no boundaries. a woman after my own heart. if only i could tap into her "quiet sense of strength" AND even moreso, lack of ego. -she's in it for the personal payoff. i truly believe there is a lot to be said for that. it defines courage. absolute peaceful resolve. in a way, i resent her for that, but even moreso, ADMIRE her and want to learn from her. it hits you "spot on" the minute you meet her. this bitch ain't no victim!!!

i believe fate brought Darlene and me together. I met Darlene literally 5 days before we left. julia dillon and i were hangin out at Starbucks in Los Feliz. I was out telling everyone i knew about the ride, asking to join us on CourageCommunity.org - Ride for Courage - and that's when we met. she doesn't ride but was at a major crossroads in her life. Fate brought us together. Darlene, though not a biker, yearned for some adventure in her life and within 5 minutes of us meeting one another, expressed a desire to join the cause. and come Sunday, the 16th, she showed up at our front door, ready to go... looking more like she was ready for a photo shoot than a 1000-mile cross-country trek on, riding "bitch" on my trike. Darn, this girl's got guts cuz this was the first long cross country trek i'd EVER participated in. BUT NOW I:VE CAUGHT THE BUG!!!

Not bad company. AND THIS JUST MARKED THE BEGINNING!
Blog post
11 months ago
Views: 294
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Me & My Harley2_by Julia Dillo Me & My Harley2_by Julia Dillon

From: Carlana
Description:

Various pics of me on my Harley. I named her "Destiny" - My friend Julia Dillon took all of these shots ... and check out the Eagle jacket . Julia designed it! Talented chick she is. She's beautiful AND talented. Julia doesn't go anywhere without her camera, and her adorable son, Jack. Julia used to ride before she had Jack. so she gets it... She just snaps away when the urge strikes. Lucky me... she's captured so many happy memories in the making.
1 year ago
Views: 124
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Me & My Harley3_by Julia Dillo Me & My Harley3_by Julia Dillon

From: Carlana
Description:

Various pics of me on my Harley. I named her "Destiny" - My friend Julia Dillon took all of these shots ... and check out the Eagle jacket . Julia designed it! Talented chick she is. She's beautiful AND talented. Julia doesn't go anywhere without her camera, and her adorable son, Jack. Julia used to ride before she had Jack. so she gets it... She just snaps away when the urge strikes. Lucky me... she's captured so many happy memories in the making.
1 year ago
Views: 97
Not yet rated

Me & My Harley1_by Julia Dillo Me & My Harley1_by Julia Dillon

From: Carlana
Description:

Various pics of me on my Harley. I named her "Destiny" - My friend Julia Dillon took all of these shots ... and check out the Eagle jacket . Julia designed it! Talented chick she is. She's beautiful AND talented. Julia doesn't go anywhere without her camera, and her adorable son, Jack. Julia used to ride before she had Jack. so she gets it... She just snaps away when the urge strikes. Lucky me... she's captured so many happy memories in the making.
1 year ago
Views: 130
Not yet rated

Me & My Harley4_by Julia Dillo Me & My Harley4_by Julia Dillon

From: Carlana
Description:

Various pics of me on my Harley. I named her "Destiny" - My friend Julia Dillon took all of these shots ... and check out the Eagle jacket . Julia designed it! Talented chick she is. She's beautiful AND talented. Julia doesn't go anywhere without her camera, and her adorable son, Jack. Julia used to ride before she had Jack. so she gets it... She just snaps away when the urge strikes. Lucky me... she's captured so many happy memories in the making.
1 year ago
Views: 138
Not yet rated

Me & My Harley5_by Julia Dillo Me & My Harley5_by Julia Dillon

From: Carlana
Description:

Various pics of me on my Harley. I named her "Destiny" - My friend Julia Dillon took all of these shots ... and check out the Eagle jacket . Julia designed it! Talented chick she is. She's beautiful AND talented. Julia doesn't go anywhere without her camera, and her adorable son, Jack. Julia used to ride before she had Jack. so she gets it... She just snaps away when the urge strikes. Lucky me... she's captured so many happy memories in the making.
1 year ago
Views: 168
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1917 1917

From: JeffBlacky
Description:

This is one of the heaviest tracks i ever wrote for Mournblade, this goes back to my second deployment while on tower watch in summer of 05, just a couple of hours before a suicide bomber drove his bomb filled car into a hotel and killed 100 people, just a half a block away from my postion.

But before that happen , with a flashlight with a red lense i started to pen this track about the wastes of war from the WW1 conflict. It took a few hours to try to work this lyric out and after the vbied attack i managed to finish the rough for it. I recorded this track in March of 06 after i returned back in country. But it wasnt released til early 07 just before i let again overseas.

This is a crowd song, that the kids loved to march in a circle , if only i can get them stop giving us hitler salutes when they chant "1917"
1 year ago
Views: 383
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l_4ffe882baef74180ba8e1a200341 l_4ffe882baef74180ba8e1a2003418e26.jpg

From: JeffBlacky
Description:

Me during "Holy War" track on a live dvd release for VD Records.
1 year ago
Views: 138
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89 Search Results for "her war"

I feel like giving up I feel like giving up

ainyfauziyah

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TommyPrice85

Surprises Surprises

Long distance intimacy Long distance intimacy

Intimacy Intimacy

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Children and inspiration Children and inspiration

CatRN

or Courage- Day 10- Trip Home or Courage- Day 10- Trip Home Part II

Ride for Courage Day - Trip Ho Ride for Courage Day - Trip Home 10 Part I

Ride for Courage- Day 1 Part I Ride for Courage- Day 1 Part I

Me & My Harley2_by Julia Dillo Me & My Harley2_by Julia Dillon

Me & My Harley3_by Julia Dillo Me & My Harley3_by Julia Dillon

Me & My Harley1_by Julia Dillo Me & My Harley1_by Julia Dillon

Me & My Harley4_by Julia Dillo Me & My Harley4_by Julia Dillon

Me & My Harley5_by Julia Dillo Me & My Harley5_by Julia Dillon

1917 1917

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